Sloppy Something is really SOMETHIN’ Sloppy Something wasn’t expected to be really SOMETHIN’. But Sloppy Something wanted more than Something. So Sloppy Something turned Something into REALLY SOMETHING’! 

Makes 5 cups 

2 T. light sesame oil – I used ROLAND brand

1 c. diced sweet onion, 1/2 inch squares

1 c. packed grated carrot – over large holes hand-held grater

1/2 t. salt

1/2 c. sm. pitted Kalamata olives, quartered (if using lg. olives cut into 8ths)

12 oz. jar sweet red roasted peppers, drained (reserve liquid) then dice into 1/2 inch squares

salt and pepper to taste


salt to taste

2 T. light sesame seed oil

1 T. jarred minced garlic

2 t. liquid smoke

In extra-large skillet, over low heat, melt sesame oil.

Add onion, carrot and salt. Stir to coat with oil, disperse evenly in pan and cook over low heat, stirring every 5 minutes till onion is translucent and soft. Salt and pepper to taste and set aside.

  • We’re not looking for char – a slow saute over low heat will achieve the right flavor and texture.

In clean large skillet, over medium-low heat, melt sesame seed oil.

Add V. beef crumbles to pan. Stir to coat all crumbs. They’ll still be dry, but do the best you can.

Salt to taste, stir, distribute V. crumbles in pan and let cook about 5 minutes. Don’t raise the heat, we don’t want them crispy beyond enjoyment.

Stir them up and over, distribute again, then cook another 5 minutes or so. Remove from heat.

Add the V. crumbles to the veggie skillet, stirring to evenly distribute.

Add garlic and liquid smoke. Stir well.

Salt and pepper to taste.

Now add the liquid from the jar of peppers. Stir well till absorbed.

Remove from heat.

Serve as: a topper over pasta, as a taco/tortilla wrap meat, over salad, potato, beans, rice and on and on. Get creative! Now you know what it’s about.

I’m not sure what to do with this. I hesitate to turn it into something that resembles something else, just to achieve the familiarity factor. I don’t want to degrade what I already developed. So I pack it up and refrigerate it overnight.

In the morning I take it out and taste. Thinking the V. crumbles would soften considerably, as most V. crumbles do when refrigerated after being cooked, I was pleasantly surprised that they maintained their chew, only better, since the translucent onion, slow-cooked till soft, now textured like the gelatinous component of fat against the chew of the V. meat, distinctly separate, but joined as one as in a piece of animal meat. Eureka.

Could this be a leave-it-alone dish? Don’t go any further with it? In painting or sketching often times artists, wanting to make something better, add a few more strokes, only to be disappointed in the result. “Know when to put down the brush” an art teacher once told the class. 

So I wait. 

Is this going to be the first Animal-Free Meat SIDE DISH I’ve developed to date? Do animal chefs make animal side dishes? It seems, the animal is always the main course. Sure, in a salad or an appetizer. But a meaty side dish that might accompany a potato main dish? HM-M-M.






  1. Gardein brand a good one. Simply Truth is a good one. Although Beyond Meat has a great burger and ground round block, which can be made into burgers or crumble, their Beyond Meat Beef Crumble is dry and tough – unusable. My dog likes it though.

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